There is a lovely book that I read a long time ago, titled The Reluctant Shaman, by Kay Cordell Whitaker.  I rediscovered her recently in a book on healers, I was reminded of her story and how she evolved to whom she is and what she brings to the planet today.  She reluctantly stepped into her destiny as a great healer, sage, shaman, teacher, and wise woman.  I, also, feel as if I am someone who is extremely reluctant to step into my destiny, and embrace my potential gifts and talents.  I was not fortunate to have physical teachers, although I have gathered great information and knowledge from many incarnate beings as teachers. Mostly, the teachers that I have accessed and learned from have been through books and my own internal explorations of Spirit through meditation and traveling the pathways 

I have studied many forms of healing and energy balancing modalities.  
Earlier this year, I was asked to extend that which I know about healing to a woman, Betsy, in the hospital who was near death.  She had lived with cancer for approximately five years; four and a half years longer than the doctors originally suggested would be her life span.  At this point the doctors were ready to let her go, but she was refusing, even as her body was ready to rest.  As I was working with her I felt the presence of horses running.  I could see the horses with my inner vision.  Their presence was so intensely tangible and strong. 

I asked her if the horses meant anything to her, to which she replied that they did not.  So I followed my inner guidance and did with them what I felt needed to be done with them, I did not know why they were so profoundly present, so I just let them be; all the while I could see and feel them clearly, running, running, and running.  The lead horse was a strong, large, powerful, white horse and he was followed many others.  When we finished, Betsy stated that she felt better.  Her skin color was better.  She appeared calmer and more at peace. 

 Four days later I gave my friend Joanne an energy balancing session.  I was not at all confident in my ability to be a vehicle for grace and healing even though I had witnessed a few powerful healings as a result of my work.  Joanne on the other hand seemed to have had a wonderful experience.  Joanne is a profoundly gifted healer, teacher, intuitive and friend.  She owns her own healing center, As I was leaving, there was a radiant, friendly woman waiting for a massage in the waiting room.  It turns out that this woman, Kim Walnes*, owns a stallion, Gideon Goodheart.  Kim was interested in having Joanne and I meet Gideon.  Kim asked us to share our different healing practices with her horse.

A week and a half later, Joanne and I did meet with Kim and Gideon. Now let me just say that I have always felt a great affinity and love for horses, but I have had very little experience with them, so I was a little nervous. As I walked up to him he lifted his head high, peered down on me and he looked right through me.  He made direct eye contact, as if sizing me up. I immediately felt an intense connection and bond with this most amazing stallion. 

He is a horse, but to me, that day, he was a multidimensional being who offered wisdom, balance, communication, great joy and brilliance.  To me, he presented as the most enlightened, incarnate being I had ever met. That day we all had a most profound, inexplicable, wonderful experience that I do not think any of us can possibly describe. Healing abounded for horse and human alike.

Two days later, I was thinking about Betsy in the hospital.  I told her that I would work with her again.  Gideon was in my mind’s eye.  I know that he was thinking of me.  I surmised that Gideon was to help me in my healing practice with Betsy, so I went home and emailed Kim to ask permission for Gideon’s healing presence.   Her response was overwhelmingly positive in that it would be wonderful for him to travel the inner pathways to assist wherever and whenever possible, so he would not be bored in the confinement of his stall. 

She mentioned that I should read about her horse, The Gray Goose on her website, as he had shown up to assist healers in the past, also. I immediately did and spent the rest of the day learning about the amazing history and great achievements of this wonderful woman and her horses.  There were pictures of Gray.  He was a strong, large, powerful, white horse.  You may see where this is going, but I didn’t at that time. 

Later that same day, as I am driving to pick up my daughter from school I am thinking about Betsy and Gideon is thinking me, very present in my mind and I remember the presence of horses when I was working on Betsy.  I had an ahh, haa moment, in that there was horse energy during our session together, still not making the connection entirely.  I thought that is cool.  I was emotionally moved. And then I remembered what the horses looked like in my vision. 

I immediately knew that the lead horse was the Gray Goose, closely followed by Gideon Goodheart, followed by others that I did not recognize.  I realized that I had met Gideon by way of my inner vision two weeks before I met him in person.  I was emotionally moved to speechlessness and tears.  That emotional response is my barometer for me to know that this is real.  I told my daughter what I was thinking about and processing.  Her response was “Mom, that’s cool, but very weird.”

We decided to get a bite to eat.  We went to a buffet that we’d been to a few times, both of us still feeling horse energy.  We walked through the door only to come face to face with this large half glass wall of carved horses jumping and running.  Neither one of us knew that it was there. I don’t think the universe could have been more articulate for me that day.  We looked at each other with awe and commented that this was indeed very bazaar.

Three days later, Betsy’s son called to tell us that Betsy was dying.  I felt terrible that I did not get back to visit and work with her.   I have learned how to assist people transitioning from this earth dimension, through what we know of as the death process, to the next.  I have been called upon to do that for others in the past.  It is always emotional and very, very real.   Gideon shows up.  Gid says that he will stay, also.  We have a private conversation regarding her process and we were all moved to a place I know, but a place in which I have never done this work before.  I thought that this was new and very interesting. 

Within a short amount of time this large, powerful white Spirit horse shows up with this lovely, gentle, kind, sweet, large, white lighted, non-defined Spirit.  She tells us that we can leave now, our responsibility has been fulfilled.  I know the horse is Gray, but I don’t know the Spirit.  I said no, thank you, I promised I would stay until the end of this process.  Gid reiterated the same.  Then, the most amazing thing happened. The Beautiful Spirit and Gray gently enveloped Betsy in the stunningly, beautiful, white light.  I was not able to see any of what happened.  It felt amazing, warm and loving beyond words and then they were gone.  I had never witnessed any of this before.  Gid moved back to his life and I went back to my busy night.  Within the hour, we received notification that Betsy had died. 

Now, I knew nothing of Kim’s history except what I had read about The Gray on her website.  I immediately wrote to Kim to tell her all that had happened and what God’s role was throughout the process.  She wrote back and confirmed that she was aware that Gray had been assisting people transition through the death process and she suggested that the Spirit might be her daughter.  I did not know she had a daughter or that her daughter had died.  I explained to her what the characteristics of the Spirit were.  She did indeed confirm that that was her daughter.  She was aware that Gray was including her daughter, Andy, in his actions of assisting in the death process.  She stated that Gray and Andy were very close in life and obviously in death.  Whew!! This was a powerful experience for me and there was greater confirmation from Kim regarding this interdimensional experience, than I have ever received in the past. 

Is this real and are the horse and Spirit, Gray and Andy.  For me I know they are real and they are just that, expressed as Gray and Andy.  There are so many worlds and so much information that the biology of our minds cannot comprehend.  It is time to expand our sense of that which is agreed upon reality, so that we can live in the realm of miracles, balance, harmony and love.   

Within a few weeks the same scenario occurred three more times with others that died.  The scenes were a little different, but the horses and the Spirit, Andy, were the same.  Amazing!! 

Since that time all has been quiet, but my life is changed forever.  I feel intensely blessed and filled with gratitude!

So, I thank you for reading my story.  I am still integrating the part of myself that is seeking to extend the wisdom that has become me, to be of service in whatever way Grace would have of me.  I am still stepping from reluctance to that which I am beginning to accept that I AM, a teacher, balancer and traveler of the inner realms for the benefit of all beings.   I am only guided to places and information that is for the greater and higher good, and obviously sometimes the effects are truly beneficial for many.  A dear friend recently sent me a beautiful statement on healers.

"Healers do not heal. Love heals. Healers are essentially lovers-those with the courage to live with an open heart-allowing love to work through them."
~Linda White Dove~

I don’t really consider myself a healer, but I am very grateful to be a witness and bridge to what we consider healing. 

I have studied many forms of healing and energy balancing modalities.  It is something that I am interested in and I enjoy learning about.  In fact, I have felt immensely blessed to have witnessed and held sacred space for some very profound healings.  For me, there is no better gift that I can give myself than to be a bridge, a vessel for balance for another.  In truth, that may be why all of us are here, to cultivate heart centered presence, love and total acceptance of who we truly are, by witnessing others and transmuting ourselves.  For it is absolute truth, that when we suffer, everyone suffers.  When we are joyful we elevate everyone and everything in joy. When a balance is corrected as healing, everyone and everything is positively effected” because we are all connected as One.”.

* Kim Walnes and Gideon Goodhearts website - http://www.thewayofthehorse.com/index.htm

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